so last night's haunted house was such a blast! i was so happy when it came together and became something so impressive. shows that we can actually get shit done and be proud of ourselves when we all put effort into it. i was genuinely surprised that so many people showed up, and im so glad that all our hard work paid off. :)

now lets do a kick ass job for jekyll & hyde!!!

hm cant decide if i want to sleep, eat, or write a paper that was due yesterday.....choices choices.

ok, so there's a costume ball going on next tuesday, and i kinda wanna go, but i don't know what to dress up as.

what should i be?

comments please?

awesome:

http://kevan.org/nohari?name=QnOfDiamnds418

go to it!

Random thoughts:

Things I Like-
1) chinese food
2) weekends
3) good music
4) talking late at night
5) cutting up onions to put in spaghetti sauce
6) eating something that i cooked
7) eating something that john cooked
8) using alcohol to solve my problems
9) being proud of myself
10) singing
11) when someone else can somehow make me smile
12) diner runs
13) staying up really late in the lounge and just talking for hours
14) being too busy to think
15) being away from "home"
16) warm weather and the fourth of july

Things I Don't Like-
1) procrastination
2) feeling uncertain
3) losing control
4) when people don't know what they want
5) when i don't know what i want
6) getting accosted on the subway and feeling powerless to do anything about it
7) rain!
8) 9 am classes after 3 am diner runs
9) being too short to see in crowds :( ....shut up its a problem
10) insincere smiles....both giving and receiving them
11) when i'm not allowed to express my opinion
12) when i'm misjudged...all the time
13) being POOR!
14) feeling like no one on this campus really relates to me
15) doing my own laundry
16) cold weather and christmas

Things I Miss-
1) 8th grade...what a fun year
2) having DI until 7pm and never wanting to leave
3) room 224 and all it meant to me in sophomore year
4) basil 330 and all it meant to me last year
5) having a group of friend who knew me inside and out, but didnt judge me inappropriately
6) being completely happy for no reason at all
7) being able to say "i love you" whenever i felt like it
8) when my hair was an unnatural color
9) having a plan
10) scheming
11) seeing the future and being able to change it
12) baltimore radio stations!
13) not having to make dinner or walk to go get it
14) snow days
15) my dog
16) that wall in my bedroom at home that everyone signed

Things I Don't Miss-
1) my family (sorry, its true)
2) feeling guilty for things that were important to me
3) high school
4) coming in at 2 in the morning every night and getting up for school at 6:30
5) shane
6) dundalk
7) baltimore in general
8) lying to my parents all the time
9) being a waitress
10) hating my life and feeling unable to change it
11) hearing the yelling before i even enter my house
12) sneaking out, sneaking back in, and no one even noticing or caring where i was for 6 hours
13) arguments with my mom
14) being hungry
15) hating the way i look
16) math class

after my important self-discovery that i do indeed know the alphabet, mary ellen and i have discussed at length the science of procrastination......instead of doing work. how does procrastination affect GPA? do students procrastinate more on short term assignments or long-term ones? what kind of students procrastinate? how does dislike or like of the class or professor relate to procrastination on assignments? how does class difficulty affect procrastination?

i smell an honors project!

honors students unite.

i heart us.

yes yes yes there will always be homework im not doing but if everyone dropped everything and did their papers and assignments and chem labs on time then we would all miss out on all of life because the homework will never end. but life will.

1:30 am? why do i only come alive so late at night? its such a paradox to me that my energy levels are inverted when it comes to daylight. maybe i belong in alaska. one of the things i have always wanted to see is the aureora boralis. wanna know why? all the pictures i have ever seen of it look fake as hell. i cant believe anything i see through the media these days. what with photoshop and all. i can create anything i want to see with enough computer knowhow. why cant that skill translate into real life?

they should make pills that make you make good choices instead of liquids that make you make bad ones. im going to make it my top priority to invent that. just let me stumble through life a bit first.

i keep telling myself that one day it will get better. the "real world" will hit me all at once like coming out into the open night air after being trapped in a stuffy basement for 21 years. but honestly thats just a naive invention of todays society. were not safe here, were not hiding, were not sheltered in our little dorm rooms and fake cafeteria food. were festering. were rotting. were wasting our time in here, working hard for nothing and not having time to breathe.

what lets you breathe? what lets you see? what lets you be at ease? that should be what you spend your time on. not homework.

with that note....i have some assignments to finish.

so instead of actually doing my paper, i decided it would be great to create a blog instead. no telling whether or not i will actually update this at all but its here for me in case i ever want to. basically i got bored with reading everyone elses so i figured id write about stuff i care about - me. im so conceited, i love it.

this paper does not seem to be going so well. at least i got laundry done today! i like clean clothes. ive been very disappointed in myself recently. ive gotten two papers back for the year and both were B-. this significantly pissed me off because i am a fucking writing tutor AND a writing fellow and i cant even take care of my own papers. as you can see, im working so hard to rectify this situation right now.

i have a feeling this blog is going to be all kinds of dark and depressing. i think i like that.